BBBBBBB!!!
BBBBBBB….our college barkada’s mantra…"Books Before Boys Because Boys Bring Babies!!!" So true. I was so into all the frazzles and dazzles of flirting and going about every other available guy back when i was in college. and let’s be honest, i enjoyed the game just as much as the boys did. i was out to prove, the guys didn’t have all the right to play on the field. we girls could kick some ass out there just as much as they can and sometimes…even better. We called this game "pangengerengkeng"–Literally to flirt. there’s even an org about it which is ongoing til now. (the kerengkengs—look it up!) i’ve been voted as secretary and have been on the officer’s chair for about 4 years now. it’s been fun. loads of fun! it is an org, composed of women / men-nearly-women (if you get my meaning), dedicated to flirting and loving men. (it’s like sex-in-the-city–only sexier!)
two years ago, i started working and i thought with so much freedom in my hands now, i could just about do all the flirting i can! and with so many options to choose from! i was on a roll! and then i came about a certain guy. who didn’t know anything AT ALL about flirting! didn’t even realize i was turning huge amounts of my prowess on to him until i spelled it out! That was a challenge. soon, i realized iv’e been exhuming every ounce of my "kerengkeng" abilitites on this guy that i’ve started neglecting other prospects. also, i’ve been becoming weak on the playing field. my "gorgeous-guy-radar" have been malfunctioning, and my taste for sexy clothes have been toned down since i found out the guy was pretty demure! What the heck?! What IS with THIS guy? And then i realized, i’ve been tired of playing the game all along. I’ve been tired of wanting someone everybody wanted because he was hot. I only wanted one person now and it was HIM! I wanted all the things that the sweetly ‘taken’ girl had! the stability…the oness, all the mushy crap, the routine goodnights and goodmornings…to be able to hear "i love you" or read it in their correct spelling and not in txt lingo. to be able to say i love you back instead of "i want you" or the famous rejectory reply "thanks!" I wanted all that, and i wanted it to be with him…
He made me lose the game. He made me take the bench. He made me foul it out and he made me love every moment of it, despite. He made me love again. That’s what I’ve been hiding from all these years. hiding behind an org and a mantra that is only a mask. this group of friends who are all hiding because they were all afraid to love and be hurt all over again. But it also teaches you a lesson. It tires you out until you find the right one who could make you come out of it.
So, thank you kerengkengs! for always being there for me before and even now, when i need it the most. you’ve taught me a lot and you’ve taught me well. my boyfriend (yes, the guy who couldn’t take a hint) and i are running through for almost two years now. and hopefully, even with the oceans now between us, we’d grow stronger.
